GoldRain

Dancing to this game of sociality,
Weaving in and forth through compliments and flattery,
Never take a break or falter,
Always needing the other person for this breathless dance,
Before your distance breaks through,
Oh Lord,
Watch me Fall to the Seas of Sin,
Drowning myself so much further,
While to me your careful reputation is falling down,
Like a child's letter blocks stacked up high on the edge of a counter...

Causer of pain,
Causer of tears;
Maker of joy,
Maker of pride;
Tonight is the last stand,
Today is the first dance.

She has tried to never falter,
Though she has sinned much;
Her mind could shine,
If only she wasn't pressed by shame so much;
Today is her final give-away,
Tonight is her first good-bye.

But never mind the little girl in her shadowed corner,
Holding tightly to a little piece of flesh,
Dressed in black tears and a Sinner's clothes,
She's never been much and she never will be,
She looks for happiness yet she might never find it,
Even though all she ever wanted was a Knight in Shining Armor.

Now turn your face away again,
She has no need of being noticed;
Her hopes and dreams are smashed,
Most of her feelings she cannot recognize;
Alas, she wallows in self-pity,
And grim shame over that much compared to others' problems.

She doesn't need True Love now,
For she fears hers is dead,
She doesn't want True Love now,
For she fears she has tainted it and will lose it forever,
And that only her wanting humanity will keep her alive and sane now,
Since the tragic recourse offered to her in early childhood is taking its toll,
Killing her deep passion inside,
Mounting her pride, embarrassment, and love for none to see,
Shooting her with cravings of a fight,
And touching her with the blissful feelings of sin.

I think it was Tuesday of last week I was challenged to find out who Simon Legree was, with the only clues being:
1) The person is a male.
2) He's a historical figure.
3) He's probably an artist (of comics?).

I've tried using Google and Ask.com and found only mentions of a historical fiction character called "Simon Legree". When I brought this up to the person who challenged me to find out who Simon Legree was, I was told that I failed. I really need help, so if anyone knows, I beg of you to please tell me!

                        
                    THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!


P.S. For speedier results, I am posting this in three Forums at GaiaOnline and in my journal on DA. I just wanted to tell you in case you don't want to post in journals where people do that!

Hey, guys, I know I haven't been on much... sorry about that, but it's not really about to change, either. So why don't you all e-mail me at twobloodythorns@yahoo.com ? I check my e-mail at least five times a week and I do write back quickly when I see a message there. Right now I haven't been on any of the four online communities that I go to because I've been catching up on Anime... but like I said, I really do check my e-mail. Actually, it's one of the first things I do when I log on, so.... well, yeah. ^^'
Okay, well have fun and have a good day, week, month, year, lol... have a great time, anyways!
Oh - and a VERY VERY VERY VERY BELATED Merry Christmas and Happy New Year's!

THE OLD VERSION:


To twist and twirl within myself,
Dreaming endlessly into unknown space,
A shadowed anger lurks menacingly
In front of the empty heart.
A tear drips slowly
From the corner of an eye,
Though no one will take notice
As it is quickly wiped away;
A time of summoned love once buried,
Now and again to kill it
With a shattered rose;
The words have been lost.
Scattered become the emotions
Of one so lonely and tired,
Trudging wordlessly through her Self,
Weary though never asking for help,
Until nothing is left,
But the ashes and hatred
Of yet another pained Soul.


THE NEW VERSION:

To twist and twirl within myself,
Dreaming endlessly into unknown space,
A shadowed anger lurks menacingly
In front of mine empty heart.
A tear drips slowly
From the corner of an eye,
Though no one will take notice
As it is quickly wiped away;
A time of summoned love once buried,
Now and again to kill it
With a shattered rose...
Oh, how my words have been lost
For an eternity never gained;
Scattered become the emotions
Of one so lonely and tired,
Trudging wordlessly through her Self,
Weary though never asking for help,
Until nothing is left,
Other than the ashes and hatred
Of yet another pained Soul.
Fire burns down passion,
Water drowns out loneliness,
So only an empty space,
A giant black void,
Can sink yet remain.
Nervousness takes over,
I feel afraid to share
What I feel might be true...
"What can it all mean?"
I might ask,
If I so had the courage to do.
I believe that this is not real,
Yet maybe it is this way for me,
Or simply I could be
Just another paranoid girl,
On the road called Life.

I have no file with even a little part of my poem "Fallen Star"... Or if I do, I can't find it... Did I even title it that? I can't remember now...

            I WANT MY POEM BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


*Has inevitably lost it* There is no emoticon that can accurately describe what I am feeling, what I am going through, right now.

But it's okay, right? It's not like it's definitely gone forever, right? Maybe it's because it's nighttime and all... MY POEM!!!!!!!!! Waaaaah... my poem... I'll never have it again, will I? Dang... Mmmmmmmmmmmyyyyyyyy pppppppppoooooooooooeeeeeeeeeeeeemmmmmmmmmmmm.... Waaah... It's gooooone.... I never made a copy of it, did I? I'm so stupid....